Best Dating Sites For Married People (2020)

Married but looking for – whisper it – an affair? 

I know, affairs are a bit naughty. But when our partner isn’t giving us what we want on an emotional and physical level, we sometimes need an outlet/release to spice up our lives so that we’re not tempted to leave them for good. 

Of course, when it comes to married dating sites, discretion and security is everything. The last thing you want is to sign up for a dating site where people frown upon your situation, and where your details are at risk of being leaked. What you want is anonymity and somewhere risk-free to have the sex you deserve.

The online dating sites for married people I’m going to review in this article are all legit, they’re all safe, and they make sure your private affairs stay private. Moreover, they’re populated by people who are in the same situation as you, and who are looking for what you’re looking for. 

Whether you want a hookup, or whether you want a friend with benefits who you genuinely connect with, there’s something here for everyone. So come join me as I take a look at the best dating sites for married people

Heads up! DatingXP and its authors don't encourage cheating but due to the nature of our site, we do cover all aspects of online dating. To get married to someone and then doing the unthinkable stuff is just unjustified! We suggest you get dating advice from an expert or talk out your feelings with your better half. 😊

Best Dating Sites For Married People

1. Ashley Madison 

AshleyMadison

Ashley Madison is the most famous of all extra-marital dating sites, largely because it achieved infamy a few years back when its data was breached. Fear not, though, because the website has worked tremendously hard to ensure that sort of thing won’t happen again. 

Its tagline is “life is short, have an affair,” and the affair site aims to pair up adulterous couples who need something fresh in their life. 

The site is home to millions of active users, there are lots of useful features, such as Priority Man that boosts your profile, and discretion is the site’s byword. 

How does It work?

Unlike a lot of married dating sites where you’re locked into a monthly subscription, AshleyMadison requires that guys purchase credits in order to send messages, virtual gifts, and use other features. It costs 8 credits to send an opening message, and you must purchase more credits as you go along.

The signup process is easy enough, and once you’ve completed the necessary steps you’re then free to check out the other members. 

There are all kinds of search filters here, and it’s really easy to find what you’re looking for. Most of the people are married and are looking to have an affair. 

You can add as many as 100 profiles to your “favorites” list, and you can send “winks” to members if you’re too shy to initiate a conversation. If you like, you can blur out your photographs so that only specific profiles can see them. 

My Experience

There are lots of ways you can improve your success rate. For example, men should definitely use the Priority Man feature, which boosts your visibility for a set period of time. 

Also, it wasn’t long before I realized that people who sign up for AshleyMadison aren’t just looking for red hot sex tonight. Instead, many are looking for friends with benefits, so it’s really important that you take the time to make genuine connections – as opposed to just sending naughty pics. 

Overall, my success rate on Ashley Madison was good. I had a great online dating experience on AM.

For more info: Read Ashley Madison's Review

Pros:

  • Millions of users
  • Aimed specifically at cheating couples 
  • Discreet & stuffed with features 

Cons: 

  • Can take you a while to make a success of it 

2. AdultFriendFinder 

AdultFriendFinder

Perhaps the most well-known hookup dating site in the world, Adult Friend Finder caters to literally every sexual preference you can think of. 

Want a hookup? It’s got you.

Want kinky sex in a dungeon? It’s got you.

Want an affair? It’s got you.

How does It work?

Once your account is up and running and you’ve chosen a subscription package, you just need to tweak your search settings. However, a major problem is that you can’t specify that you’re looking for a married person who’s looking for an affair.

That said, many users here have no scruples and there are many who won’t mind that you’re looking to have an affair, even if they’re not. 

If you like the look of someone, you can view their profile to find out more about who they are and what they might be up for. Then, you can either send them a message or send them a “flirt.” If they like you too, they’ll get back to you. 

My Experience

I didn’t find it hard to land a few hookups on Adult Friend Finder because many of the active users are looking for something casual. As I said, you can’t specify “married person” in the search filter, so you will need to spend time checking out the profiles to see what they’re up for. 

Also, whilst it’s difficult to find users who would be up for cheating with you, you can specify exactly what you’re looking for in your profile. This will help people find you.

For more info: Read AdultFriendFinder's Review

Pros:

  • Millions of users
  • Lots of features, including webcam shows and adult movies 
  • Caters to all kinds of sexual preferences 

Cons: 

  • Basic layout 
  • Will be too explicit for some

3. Victoria Milan

VictoriaMilan

Victoria Milan is an affair site aimed at people who are married but looking for discreet extramarital affairs. It’s discreet, comes with a very useful Panic Button if you need to hide your profile super fast, and it’s really easy to use and sign up to.

Other useful features include an Anonymous Blur tool that lets you privatize your pics, while the website is secured by an SSL certificate and 256-bit encryption.

How does It work?

Registration takes less than 5 minutes, and you only need to hand over your email address to get your account verified. Then, you just need to select your preferred dating interests and what makes you horny before adding some pics and a bio. 

You can search according to a user’s last login time, which is great for convenience, but you’ll find that users can change their exact location whenever they want. For example, if you live in New York, you could say that you live in California. This can get a tad confusing, but it’s designed to help people stay as safe and anonymous as possible.

Users on VictoriaMilan take it very seriously, so whenever you shoot a message, you’ll need to make sure you’ve completed your profile first. You’ll also need to upgrade your account and choose a payment plan because basic users can only view profiles – they can’t send messages. 

My Experience

I found that the key to success is a) completing your profile as thoroughly as possible b) uploading your best pics where you look approachable and sexy but not seedy, and c) being polite, respectful, and flirty.

That said, one of the best features of this affair site is that you can send people gifts that are either naughty or nice. There’s nothing wrong with something naughty now and then – sometimes it definitely works!

Pros:

  • Easy-to-use website 
  • Excellent tools and features 
  • Perfect for married couples looking for romance

Cons: 

  • Need to upgrade your account to view messages
  • Can take a while to get a match

4. Marital Affair

MaritalAffair

Marital Affair’s slogan is “where the grass is always greener.”

In other words, if your partner isn’t doing it for you anymore, it’s time to look elsewhere!

Marital Affair is fairly low in traffic compared to the other sites on this list and is home to less than a million users. However, its features are good, the customer service is fine and there’s still a lot to like about this dating site. 

How does It work?

Marital Affairs is free to sign up to, and you can search for profiles and even take a closer peek. However, you’ll need to upgrade to a paid membership in order to send messages. 

You can use the site on the desktop or your mobile device, and the advanced search functionality makes it easy to find active members who are online right now in your local area. You can also tweak your search settings so that you can find people who are further away. 

Once you come across a profile you really like, you just need to shoot them a message. It’s that easy. 

My Experience

Marital Affair doesn’t have as much traffic as other dating sites, but what I love about it is how professional, discreet, and kinda romantic it is. Yeah, people are here to have an affair, but most of the users are looking to be wooed before you meet up.

As such, it's really important to do what I did: Take the time to fill out your profile, specify what you’re looking for and be polite, have respect for others, and really put on the charm. 

On the other hand, be careful of fake profiles because there are a LOT of this online dating service. 

Pros:

  • Caters to all kinds of wants and needs
  • Easy registration process
  • Excellent user layout 

Cons: 

  • Lots of fake accounts 
  • You might be swamped with unsolicited emails 

5. Heated Affairs

Heated Affairs

Heated Affairs is home to almost 50,000,000 members worldwide. It’s a high traffic married affair dating site that offers a variety of ways to connect with others, as well as side features, such as live cam models and Contests. 

How does It work?

Heated Affairs is open to anyone of any sexual persuasion, and it really embraces the LGBT community. There are 5 steps to sign up, during which you’ll need to answer a couple of prompts. Once that’s out of the way, you need to add a bio, some pics and then you have the option of taking a few personality quizzes. 

These quizzes will make it easier for the site to score you a suitable match, so they’re well worth taking. If you’d rather not spend your time doing that, you can just carry out your own searches and use one of the messaging functions to initiate contact. 

My Experience

Heated Affairs makes it super easy to find what you’re looking for. Married couples and unattached men and women are on here, and they’re all looking for the same thing you are.

I mixed things up by trying different messaging techniques. For example, I sometimes sent direct messages, but other times I sent an Ice Breaker or a Flirt. 

There’s also an Instant Messenger function where you can even video chat with your match. I suggest doing this only after you’ve established a bit of a rapport with somebody.

Overall, I met two women off the Heated Affairs dating site, both of whom wanted no-strings-attached sex, so it gets the thumbs up from me. 

Pros:

  • Millions of active users
  • Lots of useful features, such as a Sex Academy  
  • Live model shows 

Cons

  • Fairly lengthy sign-up process

6. Illicit Encounters

Illicit Encounters

Illicit Encounters is a UK-based online dating site aimed at cheating men and women. It’s home to more than a million active users, and it’s been around since 2003. 

How does It work?

Ladies can send and receive messages for free, but men have to upgrade to a paid membership to do the same. Signing up takes around 10 minutes at the most.

Once you’re all signed up and have chosen a membership type, you’ll find that most of the users are aged between 30 and 55. Many of them are disillusioned with their current life and want a bit of fun, although some are widowed or separated.  

Sending messages is easy but uploading a photo isn’t mandatory. As such, you might have a hard time figuring out who is genuine and who is fake. Features include Virtual Kisses and virtual gifts. 

My Experience

Illicit Encounters requires patience because of the fact that you don’t have to upload a photo of any kind. However, once you’ve chosen a few profiles that you like, you can add them to your Favourites list and message them whenever you want.

I broke the ice with a few virtual gifts but I found the easiest way to succeed here is to just send a direct opening message. Not everyone will respond, and there are a lot of fake profiles. But if you write out a decent About Me paragraph and tweak your search filters, it’s possible to make a connection with someone before meeting up. 

Pros:

  • High user base
  • Attractive layout 
  • Useful features 

Cons:

  • Fake profiles 
  • Expensive 

The Scoop:

It's amazing how far online dating has come. In 2020, you don’t need to grow depressed at the state of your relationship and look on with envy at people who are enjoying red hot, passionate sex.

All you need to do is pick the right dating site and see who’s out there. Then, you can have all the guilt-free, no-strings-attached sex you want. If you're a couple looking to hookup with another couple then check out these swinger dating sites.