82 Kinky Sex Ideas to Spice-up Your Sex Life

Kinky sex could be defined as an infinite and colorful pool of intimacy. It includes all the diverse non-conventional sexual ideas humans happened to enjoy through history, and, according to studies, it roots back to ancient times – the first hints for kinky sex are 385 million years old.

What's Kinky Sex?

Everything that is not the so-called vanilla sex can be considered kinky. Vanilla sex refers to heterosexual, penetrative intercourses, usually only in the missionary position. Kinky sex, on the other hand, is everything and anything that differs from the definition of vanilla love-making. 

What Does Kinky Sex Include?

Kinks can be clustered into six big categories, which promise a lot of variations, and are only the tip of the iceberg.

  • BDSM: The acronym stands for the following six different sub-categories: ‘bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and lastly, sadism and masochism. 
  • Fantasy: Talking, watching, or reading about imagined scenarios without bringing them into reality.
  • Role-play: To act out one's fantasy or fantasies in life. It can include wearing costumes or acting according to a specified role.  
  • Voyeurism and exhibitionism: This kink category means the desire to watch others or be potentially watched during a sexual activity.
  • Group Sex: As the name of the kink type indicates, group sex involves more than two participants in the bedroom or somewhere else. 

For in-depth information, You can explore this list of kinks and fetishes.

Benefits of Kinky Sex:

Many people desire kinky sex yet, are too ashamed to speak up about it openly because society still tends to stigmatize unconventional sexuality. 

The thing is, speaking up about and engaging in the desired kinks has multiple benefits. 

Kinksters can learn more about themselves and their needs and thus inevitably experience more pleasurable sex.

Accepting the kinks can also lead to higher self-esteem, as kinksters are no longer ashamed of their desires.

Researchers spent more time on the BDSM category, and as a result, studies show couples who practice BDSM:

  • communicate better
  • are more open and intimate with each other, and 
  • are more confident 

BDSM practitioners might also be less sensitive to rejection, have a lower need for approval, and be less anxiously attached to others than non-BDSM practitioners.

Have you ever wanted to try out kinky sex but never had concrete ideas? The following list of kinky sex ideas will provide a source of inspiration with possible kink scenarios: 

Kinky Sex Ideas In The Field of BDSM 

Use a candle 

Candles are not only for making the atmosphere romantic. You could also use them to enhance the senses by dripping a little wax on your partner's body. Or vice-versa. If heat play is something you feel excited about, experiment with a candle in the bedroom, but try not burning yourself!

Cover your eyes

If you're looking for a soft-core BDSM scenario, this one might be perfect for you. When you cover your eyes before sex, you give up control, and every touch of your chosen one will be a surprise. Sex can be an entirely new experience without seeing anything.

Avoid kissing

Without saying anything to your partner, don't kiss, and don't let them kiss you. The fact that you're avoiding this intimate touch will guarantee to make both of you extremely excited. You'll crave that kiss like never before. Try to prolong the “no kiss” rule as long as you can. 

Bring in a belt

BDSM toys don't have to be expensive – you can even find them at home. A belt, for example, can spice things up and guarantee a unique experience. If you'd prefer playing it safe, agree with your partner beforehand that you'll not cause any pain with the belt. Soft touches of the leather can be equally exciting. 

Whips and chains are sexy

If a belt is not enough, and you'd like to experiment with a little harder-core BDSM, you could bus a whip and some chains at a sex store. Keep in mind, playing with BDSM always requires clear communication, mutual trust, consent, and a safe word! 

Spanking

Spanking is another harder-core BDSM, where the pain is already inevitable. Yet, many people enjoy the mix of excitement and physical pain. If you're one of them, then nothing speaks against trying hard or light smack on butt cheek.

Bite

To bring some new movements into the bedroom, try gently biting your partner. Experiment with how far you can go, but make sure your partner is also enjoying the bites. Leave marks on their body if it makes you excited.  

Dominate or Be Submissive

If BDSM sounds exciting to you, try playing dominant or submissive roles – depending on which turns you on more. You can either dominate your partner with strong and confident movements and body language or let yourself be dominated. It's all about power dynamic.

Use nipple clamps 

Nipple clamps are a turn-on for some and a no-go for others. If you decide to bring the clips into the bedroom, place them on your nipples, and let your partner play with you. If they want to play it hard, they'll pull the clips stronger; otherwise, they'll just let the clips do the job without additional help. 

Bondage

Do you enjoy being restrained? Ask your partner to use a scarf, handcuffs, a belt, a rope, or bondage tapes to tie you to the bed. If you're artsier, you could also learn about the Japanese bondage technique called Shibari. In Shibari, the submissive gets tied up in an aesthetic way. 

Be quiet 

This is a simple way to bring some kink into your sexlife. In this setting, the dominant player tells their partner to remain quiet. Either moaning or talking is allowed. If you break the rule, your partner will decide about the consequences.

Orgasm denial

Edging means your partner takes you incredibly close to orgasm and stops the movement that could bring you there right before the big O. You could change roles and repeat the orgasm denial as long as you can. In the end, an intense orgasm is almost guaranteed. 

Spend a night in a BDSM hotel room

Did you know you could book a night in hotels that equip their rooms with hard-core BDSM accessories? For a few hundred bucks, you could already spend the night of your darkest dreams in a well-equipped dungeon. Such hotels exist in almost every bigger city. 

Use a pinwheel

A Wartenberg pinwheel is a device with metal spikes that can be rolled. If you're looking for a smooth and pleasurable experience, ask your partner to apply little to no pressure when they roll the wheel against your skin. If you desire pain, simply add more pressure. 

Tie them to a chair or get tied to a chair

Imagine your partner is restraining you. The bed isn't the only option where you can be tied to. Let your partner know what you desire, and enjoy getting tied to a chair. Or vice-versa. 

Don't move!

In this scenario, you're the submissive, and your partner forbids you to move. No matter how much pleasure you receive, you can't move until your partner allows you to. Staying still lets you feel the sensations even stronger, and it can grant you a powerful orgasm.

Get a vibrator with a remote control

Would you let your partner control your pleasure? Imagine you're trying to work, meeting with friends, or doing the dishes at home. Your partner can decide to play with you at any given moment during the whole day. 

Kinky Sex Ideas In The Field of Fantasy 

Talk dirty

Do you like to talk dirty with your sex partner? Talk to them, do your research and experience during your subsequent love-making with a bit of dirty talking. 

Watch porn together

Have you already watched porn together with your partner? It's a relatively common kink scenario that's easy to implement, yet it still brings some novelty into everyday sex life. You can watch porn on these NSFW subreddits.  

Watch indie porn together

Indie porn is almost like a spiced-up movie night. Most of those porn videos share a well-founded story that is exciting to watch even without the sex scenario. Such a movie night could deliver a unique experience you've never had.

Read each other erotica stories

While watching porn together is already a mainstream scenario, reading erotica is not that well-known. The good thing about reading a story is that you can imagine the players however you please, and it is a niche you can easily find on the internet. Do you already know what your next bedtime story will be?

Listen to a porn-podcast

Did you know that you can already listen to erotica stories? Some online apps specialize in porn storytelling, which also includes the nastiest moments. Do your research, and look for your desired categories.  

Write your own erotica story

If you're not content with the fantasies you found online, why don't you write down your own ideas? Create your desired scenarios, and put the ideas on paper. You could use the writing time as foreplay.

Talk about a fantasy

You could share a fantasy with your partner by telling them exactly what's on your mind. It doesn't mean you have to play out the story; that's already roleplaying. For many people, it's already exciting enough to describe the desired scenarios as thoroughly as possible.

Ask your partner to talk through your desired scenario 

Your partner can also tell you the desired story you want to hear. Ask them to tell a narrative that turns you on the most. We're in the fantasy world, don't be shy; you can ask for your weirdest cravings. Spice up the scenario with a blindfold: what can be better than hearing a sexy story while you're not allowed to open your eyes?

Kinky Sex Ideas In The Field of Role Play

Get a bunny costume

A cute bunny costume can be incredibly sexy: just think about the playboy bunnies. Surprise your beloved one with a sexy outfit for the next time. I'm sure you'll find a suitable costume in the nearest sex shop.

Create a cozy atmosphere

Playing out scenarios doesn't always have to include costumes. You could create an atmosphere as well by arranging the room. Turn off the lights, light some scented candles, put on a sexy playlist, and see how the atmosphere impacts the night. 

Alien role play

A rather unique roleplay is when the participants dress up as aliens. You can order the outfits from the internet, or you can create your own. As an alternative, design alien makeup. If it seems like a lot of preparation for you, you can also go for an alien fantasy instead. 

Doctor role play

A white coat is all it takes to create a doctor's costume. Regarding the patient, well, they only have to undress for the anomalous examination. Spice things up by ordering the patient to lay on the table. 

Massage salon

A desire of many is to recreate a massage salon in the conformity of the bedroom. The good news is it's simpler than you think. A white sheet, some oil, and a table, and the salon is ready! Whether you'll get a full-body massage with a happy ending or something less nasty depends on your partner. 

Teacher-student roleplay

Do you find it exciting to learn something from your partner and get punished if you don't pay attention? Or by the thought that if you understand the lesson well, you'll receive a sexual reward? A teacher-student roleplay is especially easy to try out as it doesn't require any special outfits. 

Uniforms

No matter if it's a police, ambulance man, firefighter, or military outfit if you ask me, uniforms carry something sexy. Being seduced by someone in a uniform sounds exciting to many and can bring some novelty into love-making. You can order the uniforms from the internet. 

Rape-play

An often debated roleplay is called rape play or consensual non-consent. Although many would argue, it has nothing to do with rape. Kinksters desire the idea of giving up control and not the abuse itself. Rape-play requires trust, clear communication, and a safe word. 

Dirty dancing

What if you make a dancefloor out of your bedroom for a night? Dance as if you'd be in a club, but go as far as you wish in the safety of your own room. Turn on some sexy music and create the scenario of dirty dancing.

Boss versus employee roleplay

Imagine you're a hard-working secretary, and you'd like to negotiate a higher salary. The higher salary comes under one condition…Feel free to imagine your desired boss-employee scenario. To play it out, you don't need special clothing, only business casual…

Kinky Sex Ideas In The Field of Fetishes

Strawberry and whipped cream in the bed

How do you feel about bringing food into the bed? If that's something that turns you on, you could try out how it feels to put whipped cream and strawberries to your beloved one's body. Licking it off will be pure ecstasy. 

Ice-ice baby

The touch of the ice on your body is not only cold, but it's also very stimulating. You can put that ice everywhere on your partner's body, and you could also try out touching the erogenous zones with it. If you do this in the heat of the summer, the experience is even better. 

Kitchen floor sex

Imagine you're cooking something with your partner but somehow forget about the dish. You don't even have to make time to go until the bedroom. Staying on the kitchen floor is not only a unique experience. You also make sure that you don't burn the dinner.

In front of the mirror

Seeing yourself in the full length mirror while having sex feels like you're watching your own porn, what is more, it's live broadcast! To spice up the mirror experience, you could place more than one mirror into the room. That way, you can watch yourself from different angles. 

Make a sex tape

To direct your own sex movie, all you need to have is a smartphone. You could either hold your phone during sex or find a suitable spot for the device further away from the bed. If you choose the latter, make sure the angle is favorable to secure an excellent outcome.

Play with the hair

Play with your partner's hair during sex! Touch it, stroke it, and pull it. The mere touch of the hair can be highly stimulating. Don't stop after a few seconds; try out how your partner reacts if you keep paying attention to their hair.

Get a Sex pillow or Pillow under your belly

Putting a pillow under the belly of the person who's penetrated provides an angle you've probably never felt before. Try out different kinky sex positions that allow placing a pillow under your stomach or any other body part that feels exciting to you. Alternatively, you can try a sex pillow which is just amazing.

Anal Sex

The stimulation of the anus is one of the most common kinks. You can experiment anal sex with fingering, oral sex, or penetration. Try out any anal play you feel comfortable with but make sure to use a lubricant to secure safety and pleasure for both of you.  

Sexy underwear

Spice up your sex life by surprising your partner with sexy underwear. You can wear only lingerie and nothing else at home when you're waiting for your chosen one to arrive. As an alternative, you can also put on something sexy, even if you're wearing sweatpants and an old jumper. 

Suck my feet

Footfetish doesn't have to be awkward. Gently licking and sucking your partner's toes during sex might be an exciting surprise for both of you. Be open-minded, and discover your body. 

Cover your partner's body in honey and lick it off

Bring some honey to the bedroom and drip it on your partner's body with a spoon. Pay attention to the bedsheet to avoid the chores later, or play with the honey on the floor. The sweet sticky feeling holds pleasure for both of you. 

Sip champagne before giving him oral sex

If your partner has a penis, you can bring a little variety into giving a blowjob by sipping champagne beforehand. The bubbles fizz, and according to some people, that feeling is exceptional. 

Kinky Sex Ideas In The Field of Voyeurism

Go out into the wild

Having sex outside is exciting for many, but it can be quite challenging to carry out. Especially if you live in a city, outdoor sex might seem impossible. A great way to still have this experience is to try it in an abandoned park at night. Still, if you have to possibility, do it in the daylight. Meadows, forests, shores, lakesides, mountains can all provide a wonderful experience. 

Do it in weird places (skateboard place, an old airplane, a tower)

Having sex at unique locations is not only exciting, but it also promises a memory you'll never forget. Abandoned buildings, rooftops, towers, a skateboard place in the night, a boat are just a few examples. Rely on your creativity, and make sex unforgettable. 

Feel the rain on your skin – sex in the rain

Have you ever thought about having sex in the rain? How would it feel to undress and let the raindrops fell on both of your skins while giving love to each other? It seems like a beautiful, unique, and exciting experience, where it's guaranteed that you get wet. Make sure to do it when it's not that cold outside. 

Let the neighbors hear it – leave the window open

If the idea that others might hear how much you enjoy turns you on, leaving the window open can be a simple option for you. Let your voice out to make sure the passersby notice you. 

Stalk your partner while they're masturbating

Does stalking sound exciting to you but never knew how to make it come true? Why don't you talk about your desire with your partner and agree on stalking? You could, for example, watch your partner undress without their knowledge. Keep in mind; consent is a must here as well!  

Masturbate in front of each other

If you enjoy that your partner is watching you, or vice-versa, masturbating in front of each other sounds like a perfect scenario to you. Start pleasuring yourself in front of them without prior notice, and watch how they react. Or ask your partner openly to masturbate it in front of you and enjoy the show.

Sex in front of the campfire

If you love spending time in nature, you'd probably also enjoy having sex outside. What about camping, campfire, and some pleasure when other people from the camp are already sleeping? 

Kinky Sex Ideas In The Field of Group Sex

Threesome

Bringing additional people to the bedroom requires solid mutual trust, open communication, and a lot of attention. To make sure you invite the right person, go for a few dates – yes, the three of you – before you jump into the bed. 

Foursome

Keep in mind, the rules are the same as for a threesome, but the scenario is getting more complex. Suppose you desire a foursome, flirt, and talk with the chosen couple beforehand. Make sure you all vibe together and that there aren't any hard feelings in the group. 

Gruppen

Group sex is already more challenging to carry out safely, but it isn't undoable. You could look for suitable candidates, and invite them to your home. This way, you're in charge of the number of people you're going to have sex with.

Sex-party

At a sex party, multiple individuals enjoy intimate acts together. You can get invited to a party by being a member of a local sex-positive community on social media. To make the best out of the experience, discuss your boundaries with your partner in advance.

Strip Club

To spice up your sex life, try out visiting a strip club on a casual Friday evening with your beloved one if you feel that's something for you. Check in with your feelings first because to watch beautiful, nearly naked women dance can equally be a pleasurable experience and a disaster.  

Lap dance

If you don't mind seeing your partner enjoy someone else's movement, let them go for a lap dance. At the same time, if you're a woman interested in or open to other females, receiving a lap dance can be a great option. 

Swinger Club Night

One more alternative for having multiple-partner experiences is going to a swinger club. If you don't feel comfortable going all the way to sex, you could also opt for the so-called “soft swap” in a swinger club. It means you and your partner only make out, kiss, and enjoy foreplay with other people. 

Other Ideas For Kinky Sex:

Super-slow sex

What if your partner would be doing the same movements they've always been, but extra slowly? Imagine your partner goes all the way down gently in an ultra-relaxing way, and you can indulge in every second of love-making. 

Look into each other's eyes

People say the eyes are the mirror of the soul. If so, why not watch deep into the being of your chosen one? Looking into each other's eyes while having sex comes with high intimacy and excitement. Keep that eye contact as long as it feels good. 

Stay mindful

Mindful sex stands for being present in each and every second. It's consciously paying attention to the touches and movements of the other person. Engage in mindful sex by directing your attention on the now. Imagine nothing else exists, only the here and now. All you have is the given moment and your partner's body. 

Stop in the middle and talk

A playful scenario where you restrain yourself in the heat of pleasure. Stop, look into each other's eyes, talk a bit about unrelated topics, and when you can't control yourself anymore, continue. 

Underwater fun

Either in the bathtub or under the shower, sex with water carries new sensations worth experiencing. You could do many things in the water: from kissing, touching to penetration sex or simple cuddling; everything feels somewhat different with water.

Period sex

Some people find bloody sex very exciting. But you don't have to get turned on by blood and can still enjoy sex during your or your partner's period. There's nothing awkward with period sex: just get a towel, and enjoy. 

Sex-position cube

Do you ever hesitate about which sex position should come next? Buy a dice with different sex positions, and let the game begin! Some other cubes include body parts and the activity you're supposed to do with them.

Red light green light play

Another exciting sex game is the so-called red light, green light play. All you have to do is let your partner discover your body and guide them. Red light means you don't like the sensation, while green light encourages your partner to go for more.

Turn off or on the lights

Make the room entirely dark and let your other senses work stronger by blocking off one sense. If you're used to turning the lights off, try sex the other way around: turn those lights on, and appreciate your and your partner's body.

Set the mood: candles, and the perfect sex-playlist

When was the last time you created the perfect romantic atmosphere? If you can't remember anymore, it's time to light some scented candles and look for an intimate playlist to secure the mood for the night. To go one step further, open a bottle of wine, and drink it in the bedroom with your chosen one.

Oral sex with eye contact

Next time you go down on your partner – given that you're comfortable with oral sex and that's part of your sex life – maintain eye contact. Don't glance away; just look deeply in the eyes of your partner while pleasuring them. Observe how they enjoy.

Monopoly with sexual favors

Have you ever thought about playing monopoly differently? Poker isn't the only sexy game. You could play a round of the board game where there's no money: the payment is made with sexual favors. One rule: make sure you play the game until the end!

Have sex on the table

An easy scenario for bringing diversity into your sex life is doing it on the table. If you want to do it even more nasty, propose having sex right after lunch or dinner, but before dessert: hence, this time, you're the dessert.

Talk to them in a foreign language

Do you like how Spanish, French, German or Russian sound? Maybe you're among the lucky ones, and your partner can speak one of your desired languages. If that's not the case, they can still learn some sexy vocabulary. Ask them to do that!

Dirty truth or dare

Do you remember the truth or dare game from school? It's time to put it in a sexual context and play a dirty game. In this game, you can ask for anything from your partner; every desire you have can come true. Keep in mind, consent matters here as well!

One minute pleasure on a body part, then on a next one

Another exciting game to experiment with. Imagine you or your partner have only a minute to pleasure a body part. Then you have to move on and pamper something else. How long can you play this game?

Introduce a vibrator

A vibrator can very much spice up your sex life, especially if you're someone with a vagina. Don't shy away asking for a sex toy and bringing it to the bedroom. You could ask for sex toys for a special occasion like Christmas or Valentine's day, or you can just simply go for it when you're in a store next time. 

Introduce a penis ring

For people with a penis, a cock ring can be an ideal sex toy to bring some variety into the bedroom. It can increase the sensations and make sex even more pleasurable. What is more, according to Healthline, wearing a penis ring “can also result in more powerful orgasms.

Try Different Sex Toys

There are plenty of kinky sex toys to take kinky things to the next level. You can try edible panties, candle wax, full length mirror, blindfolds, handcuffs, etc.

Don't put off the clothes – only petting

Next time you go to bed together and things are getting hotter, don't let your partner put off your or their clothes. Go all the way dressed up. You can kiss and touch, but you're not allowed to undress. How long can you do this? 

Only a vibrator and nothing else

No touching, no kissing, and no penetration are allowed in this scenario. You're only allowed to use a vibrator. Does this feel heavenly, or do you desire more?

Watch sex-education together

A great way to boost the quality of sex is to learn about it. The good news is you don't even have to do it alone! Tell your partner you're open to watching a little sex-ed and use it as foreplay. Maybe you can implement what you've learned right away…

Give or receive oral sex during breakfast

If morning sex sounds exciting to you, what about oral sex during breakfast? You can enjoy receiving sexual pleasure and your coffee at the same time. That's definitely a great start to the day and slow things down for extended pleasure.

You can meet kinky people and couple on these Kinky Dating Apps.