swinging lifestyle<\/a>. Without rules, swinging just wouldn\u2019t work.<\/p>\n\n\n\nAfter all, this is still sex we\u2019re talking about. Consent is paramount, as is respect and the ability to listen to others. Etiquette exists in the swinger world, just like it exists elsewhere. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
At the same time, when we talk about rules in the swinging world, we\u2019re not talking about \u201cdon\u2019t do this\u201d and \u201cdon\u2019t do that\u201d kinds of things. Instead, rules are there to make the whole thing more enjoyable and pleasant for everyone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And when you understand the rules of swinging, you will have more success. So join me as I take a look at the….<\/p>\n\n\n\n
7 Basic Rules For Swinging <\/h2>\n\n\n\n1. Only Couples are Welcomed<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
No matter how good-looking you're (guy), if you're alone then most likely you'll be rejected. Swapping partners is one of the most fundamental and important rules of swinging.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, go with a partner if you want to have some action. It's not a solo affair for guys.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
However, there is an exception to the case. Single women, a.k.a unicorns, are always welcomed. In fact, a unicorn woman swinging is a very rare sight. But, you'll still find a few couples who don't want to have a threesome because they don't want to get things complicated in their relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
2. Ask Them First Before You Start<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
A few people turn up to a swingers' party for the first time under the impression that they can touch whoever they want without asking first. They can walk up to a guy or a woman and pinch their butt, stroke their face, or touch their arm.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nope, you cannot do any<\/em> of that with a total stranger unless you ask first<\/em>. <\/p>\n\n\n\nYes, swingers are there to swing – in other words, to touch, to receive touch, and to have sex. But it doesn\u2019t mean that the party is free for all, where anyone can touch anyone without asking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There will be some people who simply don\u2019t fancy you. They don\u2019t want your attention, and they definitely don\u2019t want to be touched. Hey, and maybe some people just aren\u2019t comfortable enough yet to be grabbed by a random stranger, huh? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s perfectly fine to walk up to anyone at a swinger party and start chatting. But before you touch any body part (except a handshake or a hug), you must make sure you have their permission. Otherwise, you might get reported and kicked out (especially if you keep doing it). <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Also, if you've any sexual fantasies that you want to try like anal sex, soft swap, full swap, and BDSM; it's important to discuss it beforehand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
3. You Have The Power To Say \u201cNo\u201d <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
I once took a couple to their first swingers' party. They were my friends, but they were also really shy and nervous about the whole thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Eventually, they got chatting and interacted with another couple who were more confident than they were. The next time I looked around, they were gone, headed for a room to have sex. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I smiled to myself. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Later on, however, I learned that, while the man was feeling it, the woman wasn\u2019t. When I asked why she went along with it, she said: \u201cI thought I had to?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m not sure where she got that impression from. No one is under any <\/em>pressure to have sex with anyone<\/em> if they don\u2019t want to. Yes, swingers are expected to engage in some sort of sexual activity at some point during the night (newbies are exempted), but everyone still has the power to pick and choose and to say No. <\/p>\n\n\n\nSomeone might reject you and your partner. But you can also reject others. And, hey, swingers are grown-ups. They won\u2019t take rejection badly! It happens all the time. If someone isn\u2019t your type, make it clear and move on. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Otherwise, the sex will be lame anyway because you\u2019re just not into it. If you're unsure about the other couple then have your first play session together as a couple in the same room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
4. Don\u2019t Take Drugs <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
This one is worth forcing home because many outsiders are under the impression that a swinger party is a magnet for all-around decadence: Orgies, writhing naked bodies – and drugs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s simply not the case. Illegal drugs are banned from swingers' parties for a number of reasons. First, illegal drugs are, well, illegal<\/em>. As such, if the cops show up, there will be arrests and the host will get put in jail. All of a sudden, they get a bad reputation, and the headlines \u201cswinger sex orgy + hard drugs end in a night of shame\u201d are written in the local press.<\/p>\n\n\n\nSecond, drugs and swinging just don\u2019t work because we\u2019re not ourselves when we\u2019re on drugs. Do we trust ourselves to make the best decisions whilst under the influence? Probably not. Sure, we might think we\u2019re having a good time at the time, but regret hits home the next day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Moreover, different types of drugs produce different effects. Do you really want to deal with the drama of a jealous partner who\u2019s suddenly started freaking out while you\u2019re high on marijuana? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I recommend that you play it safe and avoid drugs. Hey, it\u2019s a free world, of course. But if you take drugs, make sure you don\u2019t take them inside the premises. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
5. Have Respect For Everyone <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve rarely met a complete asshole at a sex party. Not because I\u2019ve got lucky, but because assholes aren\u2019t welcome. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
People go to swingers' parties because these events are safe places for people to land a hookup. Everyone who goes there knows to be respectful. The idea is that we go there to have a good time, chat, interact, and have fun, consensual sex. Respect is, therefore, paramount.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Respect goes a long way, and it means many things. It means respecting people who say \u2018No\u2019 to you. It means being respectful of absolutely everyone, from the supermodel types to the ones who aren\u2019t necessarily your type. It means not speaking about anyone behind their back. It means engaging in conversation and being friendly and open. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It also means respecting the host. If they have certain other rules that they want you to abide by, you should see to it that you respect their house. This is their house, after all. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It's also healthy for your own relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here\u2019s another thing it means:<\/em> Not asking a new partner if you\u2019re better in bed than their spouse. There are a lot of naughty things you can say to strangers at a sex party, but that isn\u2019t naughty – it\u2019s downright rude. <\/p>\n\n\n\n6. Don\u2019t Have Sex Forever<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Yes, people go to swingers' parties to have sex. But nobody should go there to have an epic, tantric sex session that lasts forever. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Whilst everyone is downstairs, chatting and preparing to go home, there are two couples still in the bedroom, moaning, groaning, and panting. Not cool. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
7. Wash Beforehand <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Lastly, you should wash before you have sex with anyone at a sex party. Others do it – and you should too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As well as having a shower before heading out, you should also make a point of washing your hands in the sink before engaging in any kind of sexual activity with new partners. This is fundamental etiquette, and it\u2019s expected from you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Scoop:<\/strong> Personal rules aren\u2019t meant to be broken at swinger parties. They\u2019re there to keep the place safe, fun, and consensual for all. Try to think of these as more etiquette than rules. After all, \u2018be respectful\u2019 is hardly dogma. It\u2019s just part of what makes someone a decent human being. These rules can be as simple as no high heels on the bed, initiating sex with only a trusted partner to have mind-blowing sex with no complications. If you adhere to the things mentioned in this article, you will have a great time swinging. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I know, I know. Rules make things boring. Rules are meant to be broken. The only rule of Fight Club is there are no rules. … <\/p>\n
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