Ever been in a conversation with someone who made you doubt your own memory, feelings, or even your sanity? You know, like you clearly remember what they said last night, but today they’re acting like it never happened—and somehow it’s your fault for being “too sensitive” or “overthinking everything.” Congratulations, you might have just met a narcissist.
Now, before we dive deep, let’s clear one thing up: narcissists calling you crazy has nothing to do with you being crazy. It has everything to do with what they’re trying to hide.
In this article, we’ll break down why narcissists pull this move, what they’re covering up, and how you can stay sane, strong, and seriously unbothered. Stick around because we’re getting into real talk, some laughs, and a lot of empowering advice.
First Things First: Why Do Narcissists Call You Crazy?
Narcissists thrive on control. If they can make you question your reality, they win. Calling you crazy helps them dodge responsibility for their bad behavior and keeps you off balance. If you’re constantly wondering, “Is it me?” you’re too busy doubting yourself to see what they’re really up to.
In short, it’s a smokescreen. And behind that smoke? Some pretty shady stuff they don’t want you noticing.
20 Practical Tips to Handle Narcissists (Without Losing Your Mind)
1. Trust Your Gut
If something feels off, it is off. Your instincts are way smarter than you give them credit for. Trust them. Don’t let someone else’s version of the story erase what you know in your bones.
2. Write Things Down
Keep a journal or even notes on your phone. When they say, “That never happened,” you can look back and remind yourself it did. Plus, it’s surprisingly satisfying to have receipts.
3. Stay Calm When They Try to Poke the Bear
Narcissists love getting a rise out of you. It gives them power. The best revenge? Stay cool. Picture yourself as an unbothered cat lazily watching them flail.
4. Stop Explaining Yourself
You don’t need to argue or justify every little thing. Save your breath. They’re not listening to understand; they’re listening to twist your words.
5. Set Boundaries Like a Boss
Decide what you will and won’t tolerate. And stick to it. Think of boundaries like invisible electric fences. Shock them (figuratively, of course) when they cross the line.
6. Don’t Take the Bait
Narcissists will say outrageous things just to get a reaction. It’s like fishing. Don’t bite. Let them dangle their bait and look ridiculous while you stay chill.
7. Learn Their Favorite Tricks
Gaslighting, blame-shifting, guilt-tripping—you name it. Once you recognize their greatest hits, you can stop falling for them. Knowledge really is power.
8. Remember: It’s Not You, It’s Them
Seriously. Their need to call you crazy says way more about their fears and insecurities than it does about your mental health.
9. Practice the Gray Rock Method
Be as interesting to them as a literal gray rock. Keep your responses boring and unemotional. They’ll get tired and move on to someone else who gives better drama.
10. Call Out the Behavior (If It’s Safe)
Sometimes simply saying, “I noticed you’re trying to make me doubt myself,” is enough to make a narcissist backpedal. Just be prepared for a tantrum if they’re the dramatic type.
11. Laugh It Off
Not everything needs a serious response. If they call you crazy, a casual, “Maybe! Crazy about not putting up with nonsense,” can throw them way off their game.
12. Lean on Your Real Friends
Talk to people who love you and know you’re sane. A good support system can remind you of who you are when a narcissist tries to rewrite your story.
13. Stay Clear of the Blame Game
Narcissists are masters at shifting blame. Next time they pull that move, mentally hand the blame right back to them like an unwanted gift.
14. Notice the Pattern, Not the Excuse
Narcissists are so good at excuses. “I was tired.” “I had a rough childhood.” “Mercury’s in retrograde.” Instead of getting lost in the excuses, focus on their repeated behavior.
15. Don’t Engage in Word Olympics
They’ll twist, turn, and tangle your words like professional gymnasts. Save yourself the mental gymnastics and refuse to play.
16. Give Yourself Permission to Walk Away
You don’t need to win every argument or prove every point. Sometimes the healthiest thing you can do is exit stage left without a dramatic monologue.
17. Use Affirmations
When their words start creeping into your head, fight back with affirmations. Try, “I know my truth,” or, “I trust my reality.” It’s cheesy, but it works.
18. Educate Yourself About Narcissistic Abuse
Knowledge is your sword and shield. Read books, listen to podcasts, or watch videos. The more you understand, the less personal their attacks feel.
19. Protect Your Energy
Think of your energy like a bank account. Every argument with a narcissist is a withdrawal you didn’t approve. Save your funds for people who deserve them.
20. Know When to Get Professional Help
If you feel stuck, anxious, or confused more often than not, talking to a therapist can help you untangle the mess and rebuild your confidence.
Real-Life Story: When Lisa Realized She Wasn’t the Crazy One
Lisa dated a guy who constantly “forgot” promises he made. When she brought them up, he’d laugh and say, “You’re making things up again.” For months, Lisa thought maybe she was too sensitive. Until one night, he forgot he had promised to meet her parents. When Lisa gently reminded him, he blew up.
That was her lightbulb moment. She realized she couldn’t possibly be crazy every time they disagreed. Lisa started journaling, trusted her memories, and reached out to friends who knew the real her. With their support, she walked away from the relationship—and didn’t look back.
What Narcissists Are Really Hiding
Underneath all the gaslighting, projection, and drama, narcissists are hiding their deep, gnawing insecurity. They can’t handle being wrong, seen as weak, or losing control. So they shift the spotlight onto you, hoping you’ll carry the shame they can’t bear to feel themselves.
It’s like a magic trick. “Look over here!” they shout, while quietly shoving their own flaws under the rug.
When you stop falling for the smoke and mirrors, you take your power back.
Final Takeaway: You’re Not Crazy—You’re Wise, Brave, and Growing Stronger
If a narcissist calls you crazy, smile (even if just on the inside) and remember: you’re the sane one. Their words are just noise meant to distract you from your own amazingness.
You don’t have to argue, explain, or convince anyone of your worth. Stand firm. Trust your gut. Save your energy for the people who value your beautiful, bright, brilliant self.
And if anyone tells you otherwise? Well, maybe they’re just a little scared of how powerful you’re becoming.