Spirituality is supposed to be about growth, humility, and self-awareness. But what happens when someone turns it into a weapon for ego and manipulation?
Enter the spiritual narcissist—a person who uses spirituality not for enlightenment, but for self-glorification. They present themselves as awakened beings, but beneath the surface, they seek admiration, control, and superiority.
If you’ve ever felt uneasy around someone who claims to be deeply spiritual but something just feels off, you might be dealing with one. Let’s break down the signs of a spiritual narcissist, so you can spot them before getting caught in their web.
1. They Believe They’re More “Evolved” Than Everyone Else
A truly enlightened person doesn’t feel the need to constantly remind others how enlightened they are. But a spiritual narcissist? They can’t help themselves.
They drop phrases like:
- “You’re just not on my level of consciousness yet.”
- “I’ve transcended my ego—you should try it.”
- “I can sense your energy is still trapped in lower vibrations.”
Translation? They believe they are superior to others because of their so-called spiritual journey. Instead of encouraging growth, they make people feel less than.
2. They Use Spirituality to Avoid Accountability
Spiritual narcissists have a unique way of dodging responsibility. They cloak their toxic behavior in spiritual phrases to make it seem like they’re above human flaws.
For example:
- They ghost you and say, “The universe told me it was time to release what no longer serves me.”
- They refuse to apologize and claim, “Everything happens for a reason. This was just meant to be.”
- They hurt you and justify it with, “I was just mirroring back what you needed to heal.”
Instead of owning up to their actions, they manipulate situations to make it seem like they’re acting from a place of wisdom.
3. They Thrive on Admiration and Special Treatment
A spiritual narcissist doesn’t just want to be seen as spiritual—they want to be worshipped. They crave admiration for their wisdom, intuition, or divine gifts.
They might:
- Expect special treatment because they are “chosen” or “gifted.”
- Get offended if someone questions their spiritual authority.
- Look down on people who don’t share their beliefs.
It’s not about spreading enlightenment. It’s about feeding their ego.
4. They Gaslight You with Spiritual Concepts
One of the most dangerous traits of a spiritual narcissist is their ability to twist spirituality into a weapon of control.
If you express discomfort or call out their behavior, they might respond with:
- “You’re just being negative. Your low vibrations are clouding your judgment.”
- “You’re projecting your own wounds onto me.”
- “You need to work on your shadow self—that’s why you’re reacting this way.”
This form of gaslighting makes you second-guess your own feelings and intuition. Instead of having a real conversation, they make you feel like the problem.
5. They Pretend to Be Above Basic Human Emotions
Genuine spirituality involves self-awareness and emotional growth. But spiritual narcissists see emotions—especially negative ones—as a sign of weakness or inferiority.
They might:
- Shame you for feeling anger, fear, or sadness.
- Pretend they’ve “transcended” emotions completely.
- Act like they’re too enlightened to experience struggles like everyone else.
But here’s the truth: No one is above emotions. Even the Dalai Lama gets angry sometimes. Suppressing emotions isn’t spiritual—it’s just avoidance.
6. They Preach, But Don’t Practice
A spiritual narcissist loves to teach, advise, and correct others, but when it comes to actually embodying their own teachings? Not so much.
They talk about kindness but are quick to judge.
They preach about letting go of ego but need constant validation.
They claim to embrace love and light but are passive-aggressive or dismissive toward others.
True spirituality is lived, not just spoken about. Watch for those who talk the talk but never walk the walk.
7. They Surround Themselves with Followers, Not Equals
Spiritual narcissists don’t want genuine friendships. They want followers.
They often:
- Create a circle where they are the unquestioned authority.
- Surround themselves with people who agree with everything they say.
- Shut down anyone who challenges them.
In healthy spiritual communities, questioning and growth are encouraged. But in the world of a spiritual narcissist, you’re either with them or against them.
8. They Sell “Secret Knowledge” or “Exclusive Access to Enlightenment”
Ever met someone who claims to have hidden spiritual knowledge that only they can give you (for a price, of course)? That’s a major red flag.
Spiritual narcissists often position themselves as gatekeepers to enlightenment. They might:
- Charge outrageous amounts for “exclusive” spiritual teachings.
- Claim they’ve unlocked truths that no one else has access to.
- Insist that without their guidance, you’ll never truly awaken.
Real spiritual growth isn’t about exclusivity or elitism. Beware of anyone trying to sell you enlightenment like it’s a VIP club.
9. They Are Hypersensitive to Criticism
No one likes criticism, but most people can handle constructive feedback. A spiritual narcissist? Not so much.
If you challenge them or question something they say, expect reactions like:
- Acting deeply offended and playing the victim.
- Dismissing your feedback as “negative energy.”
- Cutting you off entirely because you’re “toxic.”
Instead of engaging in self-reflection, they frame all criticism as an attack on their sacred wisdom.
10. They Make Spirituality All About Themselves
At the core of it all, a spiritual narcissist doesn’t use spirituality to connect with something greater than themselves.
They use it to:
- Boost their image.
- Elevate their status.
- Control and manipulate others.
True spirituality fosters humility, empathy, and a connection to something beyond the self. When someone constantly centers themselves as the ultimate spiritual authority, it’s a sign they’ve lost the plot.
How to Protect Yourself from a Spiritual Narcissist
Recognizing these signs is the first step. But what do you do if you encounter one?
- Trust your gut – If something feels off, it probably is.
- Set boundaries – Don’t let them manipulate you into self-doubt.
- Find genuine spiritual communities – True growth happens in spaces of mutual respect, not hierarchy.
- Call out toxic behavior – You don’t need to argue, but you don’t have to accept it either.
- Remember, spirituality is personal – No one else gets to dictate your journey.
The dark side of enlightenment is real, but you don’t have to fall into its trap. Stay aware, stay empowered, and most importantly—stay true to your own path.