10 Powerful Skills to Move On from Your Ex Instantly

Breakups can be tough. Whether you’ve been in a long-term relationship or something short-lived, moving on from your ex can feel like a monumental task. The emotions, the memories, and sometimes the lingering feelings can make it feel like you’re stuck in quicksand. But the good news is—getting over your ex doesn’t have to take forever. With the right mindset and some practical skills, you can start moving on faster than you think. In this article, we’ll explore 10 powerful skills to help you break free, regain your confidence, and get back to living your best life.

1. Embrace Your Emotions

One of the first steps to moving on is understanding that it’s okay to feel hurt, sad, angry, or even relieved. Many people try to shove their emotions down, thinking they’ll just “get over it” by ignoring the pain. But guess what? Emotions are like a bottle of soda—if you keep shaking them up and not releasing the cap, they’ll explode.

Pro Tip: Give yourself permission to feel what you’re feeling. Cry if you need to, scream into a pillow (it’s a classic for a reason), or vent to a friend. Acknowledge your emotions—don’t bottle them up. In time, they’ll pass, and you’ll feel lighter.

Example: Sarah, after her breakup, spent a day watching sad movies and crying it out. It wasn’t easy, but after that release, she felt more emotionally grounded and able to start the healing process.

2. Cut Contact (At Least for a While)

You may think it’s a good idea to stay friends right away, but it’s actually one of the biggest obstacles in moving on. Every text message, phone call, or “accidental” run-in with your ex only keeps you in the emotional loop. You don’t need that right now.

Pro Tip: Take a break from communication for a few weeks—no texting, no checking social media. If you’re tempted to text them, try a simple strategy: Wait 24 hours. In that time, ask yourself if it’s really important or just emotional longing.

Story: Joe tried to stay friends with his ex, texting her almost every day. But each conversation made him relive the breakup, and he struggled to move on. Once he decided to cut contact for a while, he finally began to heal.

3. Focus on Yourself

After a breakup, it’s easy to get caught up in thoughts about your ex—what they’re doing, who they’re seeing, and whether or not they’re happy. But you know what’s way more important? You! This is your time to rediscover who you are outside of the relationship.

Pro Tip: Start a new hobby, go back to an old passion, or take up something you’ve always wanted to try. Whether it’s painting, yoga, or cooking, the key is to invest in yourself and your own growth.

Example: After her breakup, Emily decided to sign up for a pottery class. Not only did she learn a new skill, but she also felt a sense of accomplishment that helped her regain her self-esteem.

4. Cleanse Your Space

Physical space often reflects emotional space. If you’re surrounded by reminders of your ex—pictures, gifts, or even their favorite shirt—it can be hard to move on. Clearing out those physical reminders can help make emotional space for something new.

Pro Tip: Take a few hours to declutter your space. Put away any mementos that trigger sadness or longing. It doesn’t mean you have to throw them out forever, but just temporarily remove them from sight while you heal.

Story: Mark, after his breakup, packed up all the gifts his ex had given him and stored them in a box in the back of his closet. This small act helped him shift his focus from the past to the future.

5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

Let’s face it: Sometimes, we’re just not in the right mindset to be alone. And that’s okay! Having a supportive group of friends and family can be crucial when you’re trying to move on. They’ll lift you up, offer a fresh perspective, and keep you grounded.

Pro Tip: Plan regular hangouts with friends, go for a walk with a loved one, or invite someone over for a movie night. Make sure these are people who encourage your healing and remind you of the wonderful person you are.

Example: When Jason was struggling to move on, his best friend Rachel made it her mission to keep him busy. From random karaoke nights to weekend hikes, Jason appreciated the support and slowly found himself enjoying life again.

6. Avoid the Social Media Stalk

In the age of Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok, it’s tempting to keep an eye on your ex’s life from the sidelines. But here’s the thing: social media stalking will only make you feel worse.

Pro Tip: Mute or unfollow your ex (yes, you can still be polite and kind, but your mental health comes first). This way, you’re not constantly reminded of them and can focus on healing.

Story: Amanda admitted she spent hours scrolling through her ex’s Instagram. But once she hit the “unfollow” button, she noticed a significant reduction in her anxiety. She could finally stop obsessing over his every move.

7. Rebuild Your Self-Worth

Sometimes after a breakup, we feel like we’ve lost a part of ourselves. You might question your worth or wonder if you’ll ever find someone better. But remember this: your value was never tied to your ex, and it’s time to reconnect with the awesome person you are.

Pro Tip: Start by writing down five things you love about yourself. It can be anything from your creativity to your kindness. Review this list regularly to remind yourself that you’re amazing, with or without a relationship.

Example: After his breakup, Tom made it a habit to start each day with a positive affirmation. “I am worthy of love and happiness,” he’d tell himself. Slowly, he started believing it more and more.

8. Don’t Rush into a New Relationship

It might feel tempting to jump into another relationship to fill the void, but it’s important to heal first. A rebound relationship can often lead to more confusion and hurt.

Pro Tip: Focus on rebuilding your life, your happiness, and your independence before considering dating again. When you feel ready, you’ll approach a new relationship with a clearer, healthier mindset.

Story: Claire went on a few dates shortly after her breakup, but she realized she wasn’t ready to invest in someone new. She took a step back, gave herself time to heal, and ended up in a much healthier relationship a year later.

9. Set New Goals

Moving on is all about shifting your focus from the past to the future. And what better way to do that than by setting new goals for yourself?

Pro Tip: Whether it’s getting in shape, learning a new language, or taking up a new career opportunity, goals give you something to look forward to and help you take proactive steps towards a better you.

Example: Liam set a goal to run a half marathon a few months after his breakup. He poured his energy into training, and by the time race day arrived, he not only felt physically strong but emotionally stronger as well.

10. Practice Gratitude

It’s easy to focus on the negative feelings after a breakup, but taking a moment each day to appreciate the good things in your life can shift your perspective.

Pro Tip: Start a gratitude journal where you write down three things you're thankful for every day. It might seem small, but over time, it can help you focus on the positives, even in difficult moments.

Story: Maria began keeping a gratitude journal after her breakup. At first, it felt silly, but as time went on, she noticed how much more content she became with her life. It helped her appreciate the good things and look forward to the future.

Final Thoughts: Moving On Is a Journey, Not a Race

Moving on from your ex isn’t something that happens overnight, and that’s okay. But by practicing these 10 powerful skills, you’re taking the first steps toward healing, rediscovering yourself, and living your best life. Remember, every day is a new opportunity to move forward, and soon enough, the pain of the past will be a distant memory. Stay patient, stay kind to yourself, and trust that better things are ahead. You’ve got this!

Join the conversation

About Dxp Team

The DXP Team is a dedicated group of writers, journalists, and bloggers with a deep connection to the online dating world. Our personal experiences, combined with professional expertise, allow us to bring authentic and relatable advice to our audience. We go beyond just sharing tips — we aim to be your trusted resource in navigating the complexities of modern dating. From practical advice and honest reviews to insightful guides, our team works tirelessly to create content that resonates with your journey. Whether you're new to online dating or looking to refine your approach, the DXP Team is here to support you every step of the way.