How to Find & Meet Singe Cougars? (The Secret)

Tired of girls of your age? Want to date a real woman?

If you’re like me, you’ll love the idea of dating an older woman. Or, in other words, a cougar.

But if you’re super young and spend most of your time hanging around the college campus, you’re probably not too sure where cougars hang out. 

Don’t worry – you’re not alone. When I was a bit younger than I am now, the task of finding a cougar seemed impossible at first because, as I soon realized, they never visited the places I was frequenting. I was left scratching my head until it dawned on me: If you want to date and meet cougars near you, you have to be creative. 

In this article, I’m going to share with you the 10 best places to find and meet cougars. Be warned: You may end up with too many cougars than you can handle! 

Let’s make a start. 

Here's How to Find & Meet Cougars Near You

1. Cougar Dating Site

Dating sites can be hit-and-miss when you’re trying to find a cougar. 


Because most of them aren’t aimed at cougars. So while there may be lots of cougars on a specific dating site, they’re probably not interested in dating younger men.

AshleyMadison, however, is a site entirely dedicated to cougars. The signup process takes a few minutes and you don’t need to hand over a lot of info, or even create a bio at this stage. However, you will need to stipulate your physical features, such as your body type and eye color.

Once your profile is up and running, you’re free to search for other members. Because CougarLife has over 17,000,000 users from the USA, there’s always the chance you’ll find what you’re looking for. When you like the look of someone, you’ll need to upgrade your account to send them a message.

The best thing about Ashley Madison is that it provides a safe environment for older women who want to just be themselves without being judged by others. This is what makes it so perfect for you. They want you to talk to them. And if you make a connection, there’s absolutely no reason why you can’t meet up for a date.

It’s especially useful if you’re the sort of busy young guy who’s focused on your studies and who doesn’t have a huge amount of time to keep going out to different places in order to meet cougars. You can literally create an account from your laptop and start chatting with people in your spare time. 

You can also use the site to send virtual gifts – which cougars love. Know more about cougar dating sites.

2. Yoga Classes 🧘

Now, the thing with this one is that – yes – you will need to sign up for a yoga class yourself. 

But that’s not really a problem because yoga is one of the healthiest activities you can engage in any way! Yoga increases your flexibility and muscle strength, it can help you lose weight, and it’s great for cardiovascular health. 

There are yoga classes literally everywhere, too, and there’ll definitely be one near you. 

So why am I recommending yoga classes other than for their health benefits?

Because older women love to go to yoga classes. 

Not just that, but if you see an older woman doing yoga it’s a huge sign that this is a cougar who takes care of her body, who is in great shape – and who is probably fantastic in bed. 

All you have to do is find a local yoga class near you, signup – and start bending your body! Then, when the class has finished, you can use the time to mingle with the other participants (the cougars). 

All you need to do is begin with a soft introduction. Just say “Hey, I’m Brad.” 

Or, you could comment on the day’s session and how great it’s made you feel.

Also, if you’re the new guy, you’ll stand out and will immediately get noticed. 

2. A Bookstore 

A bookstore is a GREAT way to meet new people – especially cougars. 

I’ve been using bookstores as a way to pick up women for several years now, and it always works. I’ve refined my strategy and here’s what I suggest you do if you’re looking for a cougar:

  • Move Around (Do NOT Lurk) – Keep on moving at all times until you find someone interesting. If you lurk, it will make you look creepy 
  • Ask a question – Let’s say you see a cougar holding a specific book, maybe a romance book. You could then ask her something like, “I’m looking for a gift for my friend, do you think this is something she’d like?” Make sure you say “friend.” If you say “mom,” it will put the spotlight on her age and your chances will be ruined
  • Go to a book reading – Book readings are super common, and they’re always attended by cougars. Plus, this is an activity that it’s never weird to attend by yourself 

4. Upscale Bars 🍷

I could just tell you to go to a bar because that’s the most obvious place to meet any type of girl or woman. 

But when it comes to classy cougars, your best bet is to save up some money and hit the upscale bars. 


Because cougars – by definition – have more money than younger women. As such, you need to follow the money. 

Cougars probably won’t be alone, of course. They might be on a night out with their girls – but that’s fine. One of your best tactics is to stand in a dense area where there are a lot of people mingling. This will get you in on the action and it shouldn’t be too hard to strike up a conversation.

Now, this doesn’t mean you’ll strike up a conversation with a cougar straight away, but that’s ok. At this point, you want to grab her attention by doing high-fives and clinking glasses with other total strangers. It just creates a bit of social value around yourself and shows the women that you know what you’re doing. You’re a regular guy who’s friendly and popular. 

And while this sort of thing may or may not impress a younger girl, it will definitely impress a cougar. 

Remember, cougars are looking for men with what we call a high sexual market value. In other words, when it’s clear that other people are into you, it’s a cougar’s natural instinct to be drawn to you, too. 

And when it comes time to chat them up, you don’t want to start with a cheesy pickup line. Trust me, they’ve heard them all before! You also don’t need to bowl her over there and then. Instead, it’s a much better idea to just be normal, charming, and – if possible – funny. Then, you’ll want to eventually transition to offering to buy her a drink. 

5. Discos

If you luck out at the bar, the night doesn’t need to be over. You could hop from the bar to a disco.

Yep, cougars love eighties disco music because that’s what they grew up with! Disco and Motown clubs are super popular with older women who have great memories of dancing to the beat of their teenage years. 

Don’t worry about feeling out of place – lots of young people go to these clubs, too. 

Make sure you make an effort if you can. Get dressed up, contract “disco fever” and hit the dance floor. 

6. Tinder 

Tinder’s a tricky one because it’s not a dating app aimed specifically at cougars. But the great thing about this dating app is that you can adjust your settings so that only older women show up in your search results. 

Will they all match with you? No. But many – upon seeing that a cute younger dude is interested in them – will do. 

I’ve talked to a few cougars in the past who’ve admitted to me that they use apps like Tinder and Bumble to find younger guys. And as long as you’re genuine, smart, funny, and show off your best qualities, there’s absolutely no reason why you can’t use Tinder to find and meet cougars near you. 

To increase your chances of success, you need to sell yourself. In other words, be confident, show them that you’re ambitious and that you desire them. And whatever you do, don’t mention their age. They know how old they are – they don’t need you to remind them.

Another good thing about Tinder is that it’s completely free to sign up to and send messages. 

7. The Gym weights 🏋️

If you spot a cougar at the gym, one thing is for sure: This is a lady who cares about her body. 

And while some people might tell you that looking for women at a gym is “creepy,” that’s because they’re jealous of you! 

Sparking the romance flames at a gym is actually a lot easier than you might have thought, too. My first piece of advice is to join a gym and start going regularly. It won’t before you start to notice the same faces – and they start to notice you. After a few weeks, you can transition past “hey,” and onto proper conversations. You could also say something like, “Hey, could you give me a hand?” Or, “What does that slogan on your shirt mean?”

That said, there are a few things to bear in mind here. First, see if you can find out a bit more about her from someone who works at the gym. They may be able to tell you if she’s married, has a long-term partner, or is otherwise out-of-bounds. 

Also, never approach a woman mid-workout. If she’s focusing on what she’s doing, what until she’s done. Then, you could shoot her a compliment on how hard she was working, or how focused she seemed. 

8. Karaoke Bars

Yep, it’s no secret that cougars love karaoke. This probably means that if you want to date one, you’ll have to learn to love it, too! 

Karaoke is great entertainment, and older women look forward to going out with the girls and singing classic songs to a packed bar. 

If you fancy yourself as a bit of a singer, you could pluck up the courage and ask them if they want to do a duet with you. On the other hand, you could build up a bit of rapport with them first before they end up asking you to duet with them. 

Just make sure the song is a hot one. It could be romantic, it could be sexy, but it has to be hot

9. Go Volunteering 

Volunteering might not sound like the sexiest thing you could ever do, but there are two things here: First, cougars go volunteering all the time. Second, older women appreciate a kind, compassionate and caring man who goes out of his way to help others. 

Naturally, you must be ethical about this. If you volunteer anywhere, you need to be doing this for the right reasons. However, there’s absolutely no reason why you can’t kill two birds with one stone and meet a hot older woman while you’re doing your bit for the community. 

10. Music Venues 

Lastly, another place cougars hang out near you is music venues.

Cougars especially seem to enjoy watching live cover bands, so the next time you see a cover band (preferably a band that’s a few years old) is playing near you, get on down there.

Concerts are great places to meet women because you can saddle up next to a cougar during a groovy song and start dancing with her. Before you know it, you’ll be lost in the music, going in for the kiss – and maybe even exchanging numbers. 

However, don’t overdo things. If you go in for the kiss, keep it short and sweet. There’s every chance she really wants to see the band, so don’t make her miss her favorite songs!

Well, there you have it: 10 places to go and meet cougars near you. Just remember to be confident, to never mention their age, and to play it cool. Also, don’t play games – cougars are too experienced for that sort of thing. 

When you pull one you would need advice so be prepared in advance, here are Cougar Dating Tips you can read.

Similar Read: How To Find MILFs For Sex or Dating

About Will Titterington

Will is a writer, coach and life lover who enjoys helping people reach their potential. Will has plenty of experience with Online Dating. He loves to test different apps and sites and share his experience on DatingXP. He loves art, sports, connecting with new people from all over the world, and making people laugh.