How To Find & Meet Swingers Near You?

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Swinging is a really fun lifestyle. But the first thing beginners always ask is, “how do I find and meet swingers?” I mean, it’s not as though you can make a Facebook post asking if your friends would be interested in swinging with you, is it?

Like you, I love swinging. I’ve been doing this for a few years now and – like you – I had no idea where to start looking for like-minded people. 

Fortunately, while swinging may be a very discreet way of life, finding swingers is easier than you might have thought.

In this article, I’ll be showing you exactly where swingers hang out, and how you can join them, introduce yourself – and start swinging. 

6 Places Where You Can Find & Meet Swingers

1. Go To a Sex Party

The thing is that you can’t just go to a sex party. In reality, you need to build up your network of swinger contacts first and then get invited to a party. I’ll be looking at other ways to do that later in this article, but for now, let’s just say that the number one place to find and meet swinger is a party.

So what’s the best way of getting invited to one? 

You’ve got a couple of strong options. One is to join a site like Kasidie, which is dedicated to swinging. Here, you’ll find swinging events (such as sex parties) posted all the time, including ones near you. 

Another social swinging site you could try is FetLife. This isn’t really a dating site (I’ll go over some of these later in the article) as much as it is a networking site that gives you the chance to shoot the breeze with swingers, make friends – and get invited to sex parties.

However, before you go to a sex party, it might be best to establish a few contacts from Kasidie and FetLife and go along to a munch.

What’s a munch?

A munch is a non-sexual social gathering of swingers who meet up in a neutral venue, such as a pub, and just chat about this and that. It gives you the chance to immerse yourself in the swinging lifestyle, make friends, and get invited to more parties. 

One final tip: your chances of being invited to a sex party are so much better if you’re a couple. If you’re a single female you have an okay chance of being invited (single females are known as “unicorns” in the swinging world), but if you’re a single guy you can pretty much forget about it. 

2. Go To Clothing Optional Resorts 

Yes, these sorts of things really exist! 

Clothing optional resorts are exactly what they sound like Vacation resorts where people are allowed to walk around naked if they want to. 

Whilst these aren’t sexual resorts as such, it’s totally up to the individual if they want to strip and chill by the pool without any clothes on. No one will judge them and no one will arrest them. 

As you can imagine, clothing-optional resorts are very popular with swinger groups. There’s a fair number of them in places like Cancun and Jamaica, with my personal favorite being Jamaica’s Hedonism II. 

Whilst not everyone who goes to these resorts will be a swinger, you can bet your bottom dollar that many of them will be. In which case, you just need to order yourself a drink and start chatting with folk. 

3. Go On A Swinger Cruise 

If you’ve got a bit of money in the bank and was planning to take a vacation anyway, why not go on a swinger cruise? 

Swinger cruises are just like regular cruises. The only difference is, everyone who’s onboard the ship is looking to have group sex!

Sound fun? It is!

4. Signup To SwingLifestyle 

SwingLifestyle is the most popular dating site for swingers. It’s also the oldest dating site for swingers and is home to 16,000,000 members around the world.

Why should you use SwingLifestyle?

The number one reason is that it’s specifically aimed at swingers, which means that it’s a great place for you to meet new like-minded couples. Many of the users are very proactive; they want to get to know you, and they want to meet up. 

The site has lots of great features, including Swinger Clubs which shows you exactly where the nearest swinger clubs to you are. The site also advertises and promotes swinger cruises, while another great feature is “Hot Date.” This lets you advertise to everyone that you’re free to meet up with your partner and go on a date with another couple.

I’ve been SwingLifestyle with my partner on and off for the past few years. It’s an excellent place to meet swingers, as well as new friends. As long as you’re polite and respectful, there’s no reason why you can’t meet lots of new people, too, and completely immerse yourself in the swinger lifestyle. 

Read, in detail, more about how to use Swinglifestyle here.

4. Try AdultFriendFinder

AdultFriendFinder is an adult dating site aimed at singles and couples who are looking for a hookup and other kinds of casual sex encounters. While it may not be aimed at swingers specifically (unlike SwingLifestyle), there are plenty of couples who use AFF to find other like-minded couples.

AFF boasts over 80,000,000 active users, which means there’s something for everyone. If you’re using it to swing, your best bet is to upload pics that include both of you, before stating in your profile exactly what it is that you’re looking for.

However, whereas SwingLifestyle is a great place to make a proper connection with other couples, most users on AFF tend to be more forward. It’s also a very graphic website, where nudity is allowed. So you’ll need to bear all that in mind.

But, hey, if you’re just looking for a good time swinging with other couples, you can’t really go wrong with AFF. Because a good time is what everyone on here is looking for. 

Like SwingLifestyle, AFF is only free to browse profiles. If you want to start exchanging messages with other users, you will need to upgrade your account. 

Read, in detail, more about how to use AdultFriendFinder here.

Inside Scoop: Here's the list of most popular swinger sites (don't miss on it!)

5. Visit a Sex Shop 

Sex shops are great for lots of things – adult movies and sex toys in particular!

But, as you may already know, they can also be great places to meet new people who are into the same kinds of kink as you are. 

They’re also pretty good places for finding out where the local swinger clubs near you are.

How so?

The best thing to do is to ask the person behind the counter. They may or may not be able to help you, but it’s always worth an ask. And even if they personally don’t know where the nearest swinger club is, they’ll surely know someone who does. Or, they may even have a website they can point you in the direction of. 

6. Use CraigsList 

I’d say that CraigsList shouldn’t be the first place you look for swingers online (I recommend you try those online swinger dating sites I mentioned earlier first). But CraigsList is definitely a good shout if you’re having no luck elsewhere.

CraigsList is great for casual sex, and it’s used by swingers up and down the country. All you have to do is create an account, pop onto the site, and search for local couples who want to swing. 

The reason I recommend using swinger dating sites first is that they’ll give you a chance to feel your way into the swinger lifestyle and make proper connections. On CraigsList, it’s probably assumed that you’re already experienced with swinging, which could make your first encounter a bit awkward. 

Inside Scoop: How To Become A Swinger?


Now that you know how to find and meet swingers, you’ve got little time to lose. Sign Up to a few sites with your partner, start making new connections – and start putting yourself out there! 

Wherever you go, make sure to be polite and respectful when the situation calls for it, always abide by the swinger etiquette – but more than anything, have a fab time!

Mary J. Gibson

Mary J. Gibson

Mary J. Gibson is a contributing editor at She is a sex & dating expert and often gets cited on Bustle, AskMen, Cosmopolitan, EliteDaily and a lot more big trusted publications. She stay up-to-date with the industry by interviewing and making connections with new and growing dating services.

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